A Gardeners Forum Forums General Discussion The Banter Hall We're getting married, now what?

After 6 1/2 years my b/f has officially proposed and we're planning on getting married sometime in October. I'm happy and excited but I'm also a bit lost. I'm a bit of a tomboy, very casual, so I don't usually ever dress up. I only own one nice dress and have only worn it once. I do want to look nice and wear a dress for my own wedding so my question is, can you just go into any bridal shop to try on dresses, without any intentions of buying, just to get an idea of what type/style of dress would look good on me? If I know what type of style to look for I'll at least have somewhere to start. If I design my own invitations, can any printing shop, like kinkos, print them up for me? Is it better to order invitations? Dresses for the girls, should I take them with me to try on dresses so we know what style to look for for them? Where would I find a suit for a 10 year old boy? At least picking out flowers won't be too tough for me, I know about them,

Congrats, Cheryl!

Dresses, yes it is ok to go in and try on. They will try to tell you you need a lot more but don't fall into any expensive traps. They may have exactly what you need at a great resell price though so just keep an open mind.
Go in by yourself. Save the girls for a separate trip(s)
Yes kinkos or any print shop can do your invites for you
Suits for boys are out there. Start modest $-wise because they outgrow them so fast. Or you might find what you need for rent at a tuxedo shop.

Thanks Tina. When I looked at some bridal shops online, they said something about making an appointment. I don't want to make an appointment to try on dresses, and I'm on a budget so no one can talk me into something I can't afford. Thanks again, I think I know what I might do next weekend!

You do have time to choose what is right for you, Cheryl
If you go into a larger chain store, they may also have things suitable without an appointment involved. Are you planning a traditional dress? morning, afternoon, evening?
There are probably more questions than answers right now

I'm not necessarily looking for traditional. I don't want anything big and puffy and I want color. I've also been looking at bridesmaid dresses but I have seen a dress that was classified as informal that had some color that I liked. There are more questions than answers but, your right, I do have time. I just don't want to put everything off until the last minute. I'm trying to at least get an idea of what I want. It will be a small wedding, mostly family, and I already know what type of ceremony I want and a friend of mine and her husband marry people as a side business so I've already got someone to marry us for a good price. The kids will also be involved in the ceremony.

sounds like you are on top of everything and you have leisure to figure out what you want to wear. Then after you have chosen take the twins. They will definitely want to have their input on their own clothing. And you will have a good idea of those colors/styles that will be acceptable to all. It sounds like you may be able to avoid those expensive bridal shops altogether. (this would be my choice and was a year plus ago)
I am so happy for you. Share all here. We love this stuff.

Of course I'll share here. I don't have any other friends to share with, hence the small family wedding.

congrats Cheryl!!!

As we say here, Cheryl... Mazel Tov! (congratulations! Good Luck!)

Do you have a David's Bridal there? My daughter got her prom dress there last year, and it was very "low pressure". One side of the store is bride dresses, and the other side was bridesmaid/prom dresses. They had lots of styles and colors to chose from.

Congrats Cheryl... I was going to say same thing- about Davids Bridal or the stores that sell prom dresses...I would try Penny's for the girls dresses, they have a bridal dept and their clearance stuff is great- I got my Mom of Bride dress there on clearance for 20 .oo marked down from 150... if you wanted white and reg type wedding dress but not to fancy I have one in my basement..never worn..... slip too .... should be a lot of places selling suits and stuff right now for proms and graduations... or it might be a lot cheaper to rent...
Nana

Congrats Cheryl!
I was going to suggest as Lynne did David's Bridal,, Also Sears and Penny's /macy's Dillards,, Malls have have a bridal dept OR even Formal wear,, <<If color is what you want. You'd be surprised what woman wear for their wedding dresses out of the formal dept and a little alterations they have a lovely wedding gown in color.

CHERy,

Congrats are in order.......By all means just go in and say your looking .I am a casual dresser myself.. Slacks/jeans till it hits 80......

satin dresses are the biggest hit now.. Or lookalike satins.

I think lace is beautiful, but yes do it in your own style ......Ask Jiffymouse to show her daughters dress it was so sweet..

good luck

dodge,

i'm so happy for you cheryl. you have gotten lots of good advice about dresses. i would also look at outlet shops. my girls got their wedding attire (3 weddings total and they were in each other's weddings) from a specialty shop, an outlet, dillards, penny's, and a friend's closet. the actual wedding dresses were the specialty shop, outlet, and friend's closet.

best of luck to you!

How fun is this!!!

So are you having a traditional wedding dress with bridesmaids and all that? If you have an upscale Belks or someplace like that you can find everyone's clothes there. Our town has a Belks but it's so different from the one in Charlotte on the fancy side of town. So then, go to the fancy part of your town to shop. It's still cheaper than a bridal shop.

Oh this IS great news, Cheryl!!

And yes, Keep us informed as you go through the quesitons and decisions. This is very fun and exciting, though I know it can also be nerve-wracking for the Bride-To-Be.

Just remember it is YOUR wedding and YOUR day... you should be able to have it just the way you want it! Traditions are only a general guideline, so feel perfectly at ease to do as much or as little of them as you want!

There are some nice colors out there evem in traditional wedding gowns these days besides the usual white or off-white. I've seen White Chocolate, Mink, and Champagne as well. Lovely!

The appointments at bridal gown stores are useful so that when you go in, you are assured of having an expert devote herself entirely to you. She'll ask about your taste, your dress budget and when is the wedding. She'll bring you suitably styled gowns to try on. Nobody expects a girl to choose the final dress during her first shopping expedition and plenty of women try on very many gowns before they choose. So don't hesitate to make appointments at different shops. You are a Girl On A Mission!


Merme

OH MY!!! I Just sat & typed up a lengthy post to you Cheryl----and when I hit submit it was gone, I looked & looked & still I could not locate it.----IF I have time I will try to repost what I said this AM if not I will try to re-post tonight----

But for now---Congratulations!!!!

Congratulations Cheryl!! How exciting!

David's Bridal has some good deals. I know they have a whole section of bride's dresses for $99 but if you want color you could go with a bridesmaid dress and probably get it even cheaper than that. Good luck and keep us posted! Can't wait to hear all your plans!!

Cheryl----again congratulations!!!

About the Bridal stores---include Dillards, Macy's, Penney's etc---you can go to any of them as often as you like to "look" at the dresses.----My oldest used to go when she was in College--she and her room mates would take turns being the "bride to be"--all of the clerks were alweays nice to them---MANY women go looking many many times. the stores expect it and are alsways nice because hey, you may well buy your dress from them---
as far as booking an appointment that is only needed if you want help in looking for, & getting into the dresses. Otherwise you do not need an appointment---and as far as that goes IF you find a dress you cannot live witrhout & then want help---if/when someone is avaialbe they will help---
MY youngest also went in, no appointment, and tried on & bought a white sheath wedding dress from Davids Bridal for $99.00 to wear to one of her proms----and NO ONE at her prom said hey is that a wedding gown---she looked very very nice.

about invitations---MANY printing places have invitationbooks to look at and order from--as do many news papers---and if you wished to design your own I am sure such as you asked about would glady print them---hey they may even have invitation books , etc to pick from there.

about the boys--look at Penneys etc for them as well--but if they have no real need for news suits renting MAY be the way to go---I would shop around & see what is the best option is to fit your needs.

as for the girls--it is prom & June wedding time right now-----I would look at all the stores mentioned above--and if you find a dress that they like at say Dillards or some other chain type store, they can & will call around to the other stores to get maching ones if their store does not have enough---and never forget to see about hiring a seamstress--SOMEtimesit is cheaper--and then there is idea of perhpas buying a dress more suited to the each of them is best--(the same color but differnt styles or the same style and different colors)---they could possible wear it agian that way--making teh cost more understanding.

also "nice" artificial flowers are sometimes more reasonable and the brides bouquet can be then put into a large bowl or brandy snifter and used as an center piece ( one buys a small bouquet of flowers wrapped in a like color ribbon to "throw"--reserving teh original bouquet for you.

and then there is the buying of 2 garters--(one you should/might get given to you with the wedding dress (if bought at a bridal shop) THAT one you have your new DH throw & you buy a nicer one to keep---((It can then be the something old for when your DD gets married.))--

..............and remember:
............................Something old
............................something new,
............................something borrowed
............................and something blue

Good luck and keep us posted!!!!!!!

I just re-read one of your posts and I think I misunderstood. When you say girls and kids - are you talking about bridesmaids - like your friends? Or your children who will be at the wedding? Guess I'm confused because for some reason I didn't realize you have children.

cheryl, i forgot to put one thing in about the wedding for you to consider. target has very nice suits for men and boys for a very reasonable price (i think around $60). maybe less. I got matthew's suit for his sister's latest wedding (april a year ago) there. and it looked as good, or better than, some of the more expensive ones i saw at her wedding.

i will say though, weddings are like raising kids. everyone can tell you their idea of the "right way" but in the end, it is what you are going to be comfortable with. best of luck to you

Thank you all for all your advice and well wishes. Much appreciated. We do have David's Bridal here and I will definitely be checking them out. I did look at some dresses online and have a general idea of what I think I want. My mom originally did not want to help with any part of the wedding but my step dad apparently felt differently about it and now they are going to help me. I think I'll just ask them to pay for a banquet room. The rest I candle handle between now and October. There is a beach club near my house and they do things like weddings and proms and they are right on the beach. That would be a perfect place to get married on the beach and stay dry in Seattle in October.

I have been looking at mostly bridesmaid dresses, mainly because you really do get a lot more choices of styles and colors, but they are more than half the price of the wedding dresses. Some of them even look the same. Doesn't make much sense to me but I guess that's just how it is. As far as suits go, I'm nervous about renting a suit for a 10 year old boy who will be eating cake and probably ice cream. I don't think he'd be able to keep it clean, he forgets that his clothes aren't napkins. Maybe for Aros we can rent a suit. I'm thinking of green and white for the girls, and black suits with white shirts and green ties for the boys. My favorite color is green so I'd like that to be a part of my wedding attire. Once I figure out what style of dress will fit my funky body shape I'll have a better idea of what I want and will be able to make an album of ideas.

I'm not having a traditional wedding, of that I'm sure. No bridesmaids and all that. I do want the kids to be part of it so in a way the girls would be my bridesmaids and Joey would be his dad's best man. Other than that there won't be anyone else in the actual wedding. My parents and grandparents will be there along with my boyfriends parents and possibly our siblings. I have one brother, he has one sister. We aren't doing rings and we are not religious, so that's one reason why the wedding won't be traditional. I want to do a family sand ceremony instead. That way the kids would be included in the ceremony. Aros and I will do our vows and then the kids would come up and we would all do the sand to seal the deal so to speak.

Sheri, I don't have kids of my own. Aros has three kids. Twin girls, Ashley and Amanda, and one boy, Joey. Aros has 50% custody and therefore the kids live with us every other week. I've known the kids since they were 7 and 3 so I've practically watched them grow up. The girls are 13 (going on 25 at times) and Joey is 10. The girls are a couple inches taller than me now, maybe I'll wear heels and put them in flats, lol. Joey is only about 4 inches shorter than me.

Very intelligent words, Jiffy---

I know what you mean about tall girls. I have a 10 year old step grand daughter who is 1/4 inch shorter than I. Sometimes it's hard to be short. :wink:

You have your own wedding party, 2 girls, 1 boy, that's all you need. And of course a groom. Maybe you can just get everyone Sunday clothes so they can use them again.

We just went to my husbands nieces wedding, 1st for both, no children, traditional church with wedding party and wedding dress BUT I noticed sitting in the church that there were no flowers. The bridesmaids bouquets were small -just a few flowers with green around them. I found out later that they decided to cut church decorations and put the money in the reception. It was a fun reception.

any new plans?

Sorry it took me so long to respond. No new plans yet. Got some stuff that needs taking care of before we can even pick a date. I'll keep you posted.

we'll be waiting,.. patiently.....

Thats all we can do, we arent in the wedding..LOL

Well, Barb when you are right, you are right !!!!

good luck on your wedding Chermoni, I hope you find the perfect dress!